ANOTHER DAY OF SNOW

Well, two days til Christmas...and it is snowing again. I am beginning to think it is a snow conspiracy! Actually I really like it and sort of wish it was like this every year. My plan today is to go cross country skiing out my front door before heading off to the family Christmas party. I hope I have time.

I have read my Bible already today and have to say that it is a really refreshing way to start the day. I went from feeling a bit grumpy and annoyed about being awake to feeling like I can actually do "it" all today. It is a great feeling. We do have a few major adjustments to make over the next few weeks due to a certain family event that shook our lives but I am very optimistic that we are well on our way to having that ironed out...until next time.

Let us be aware of those who are in need of help during this unusually snowy time. Whether it is the neighbor needing to be dug out, the single mom who can't afford a gift for her kids or the homeless freezing on the streets, let's try to help where we can. Remember that when you ask God to use you to help others, he will. Just keep your eyes, mind and heart open. When it happens, you do not want to miss the opportunity.

I am reminded of the time my sister and her friend were able to help their neighbor kids. Kristy and Jolene were neighbors in an apartment building and another of their neighbors was a neglectful mother of two or three kids. Kids old enough to be left alone but the youngest would glom onto Kristy as a stand in mom. Since the mother was off on one of her week long stints away from home it became clear to Kristy and Jolene that a happy Christmas was not in the cards for the kids who were sitting alone in the filth next door. Kristy and Jolene plotted for a way to do something for the kids. Late on Christmas Eve they went to Walgreens to see what they could find in the way of gifts for the kids. Even at the last miniute they were able to come out with quite a haul. The got it all wrapped and went next door. They told the kids that they were out and about when a fat man with a white beard and a red jacket approached them and asked if they knew Sally and Billy. (Of course that isn't their real names!) Kristy and Jolene said yeah we know them. The man said, well I have some things I am hoping you can deliver to them for me. So of course Kristy and Jolene agreed and did so.

These kids were SO HAPPY! Though they lived a rough life and deep in their hearts they knew the gifts were from Kristy and Jolene, for that day they believed in Santa. Regardless of anything else, for those kids, Kristy and Jolene had performed a Christmas Miracle.

Without ever mentioning His name, Kristy and Jolene had shown the love of Christ.

Breakfast today

We got this from an American Girls Cookbook. This is an adaption from a traditional Swedish breakfast. I cannot remember what it was called so...

The girls have named this:

Rice Delight

Rice (I use white as it is cheap and always on hand but you can use brown for a healthier alternative)
1 apple
cinnamon- to taste
nutmeg- to taste
sugar- to desired sweetness
butter
milk

I cook my rice in my rice maker according to amount I need. Quite a bit for a family of five. As it is cooking I chop the apple and add it right away so it cooks for a few minutes. Add Cinnamon and nutmeg to the rice as it cooks.

As I am serving into bowls I add butter, milk and sugar.

Ohhhh! So GOOD!

MY FAVORITE CROCK POT RECIPE

I am always at a loss for dinner ideas so when I have a good one it makes me really happy. Maybe that is why I am so giddy today. Seriously I am in such a good mood!

This is a pretty common recipe but it is what is filling our house with yummy smells today so I thought I would share for those who may not have tried it yet.

Just a run of the mill Pot Roast with the most delicious gravy! Dave hates gravy but he sure likes this! (See bottom of post for my vegetarian comment)

1 roast- whatever fits into your crock pot
carrots- however many you want or will fit in your pot
onions- same as above
potatoes- same
other veggies- different people like different things put in what you want!
1 pkg onion soup/dip mix
one can Cream of Mushroom Soup
some water- the roast will release more liquid too so today I put in about 1 1/2 cups I don't even know if you need to add water I just do.

Coat the roast in flour and brown in a pan with a bit of oil. I do not always do this but I did today. It is apparently what you are supposed to do. I assume it adds to the flavor. Maybe, someone who knows can explain that one better in a comment! (Aunt Char?)

Put all ingredients into Crock Pot. At this point I usually cook as long as time allows. The main thing is to get the meat cooked thoroughly. You can set it on high to cook faster but the flavor is so much better the longer you cook it. Today I did not have 8 hours so I set it on a high setting for 6 hours.

So maybe this recipe isn't the answer to the worlds problems but it is delicious and easy and fast and I don't have to think about dinner again until it is time to put it on the plate!!! YAY ME!

You know I have a lot of Veggies (that is my name for the vegetarians I so dearly love) in my life and I think this would be great sans meat with just a pot full of veggies too. OH YUM! In fact I think I will try it soon! As a side dish OR main course.

FINDING NEW WAYS TO RENEW REDUCE REUSE AND RECYCLE

Ok so nothing is really new except my way of thinking. And it isn't that I am new to the whole recycling thing but I just have a different perspective on it for the moment.

I will be the first to admit that my ideas and plans are often so fleeting that they do not last more than a season. And usually a short one at that. But at heart I am a greenie and that has been the same for a long time. And I think God is happy with me this way because look what I recieved in a gift exchange yesterday.

I should say I WON it in the gift exchange because it was one of those nutty games where everyone goes crazy and "steals" each others gifts. It was actually a lot of fun! There is a lot of speculation that I might have stretched the rules in order to win this. I can honestly say that it was about 50% plotting and 50% serendipity that I ended up with the coveted travel coffee cup plastered with greenie comments about recyling and reusing, etc.

So, In the latest Sunset magazine I read about some people who were committed to buying nothing new for a year, other than medicines and a few bathroom necessities. They showed off their thrift store Christmas ornaments and homemade bread that they gave as gifts and that sort of thing. It just got me thinking how much money I spend that is such needless waste. And I am a pretty frugal person by upbringing. Seriously though, sometimes I find myself buying something that I simply don't need or maybe even shouldn't have.

So I thought, well, even if I don't commit to buying nothing new for a year, I can challenge myself to make all my gifts this year and just see how far I can take it. So I put $20 in my pocket and headed off to the thrift store to see what I could find. I promised myself not to spend a penny more than that. Well, I knew I was going to make beanies for my nephews so I wandered over to the yarn section of the store and I was SO pleased with myself when I found the most awesome thick yarn perfect for making a trendy beanie for my oldest nephew. As you can see from the look on my face I am pretty proud of the hat too. Well it took me long enough to figure out how to make the stupid thing. I tried following a couple patterns and ripped it out about 6 times before I decided I would just make it up as I go. Well, after doing it wrong a few times I had figured out how to do it right and this was the end product.



Well, as soon as I was done with that and both girls had modeled it I felt ready to do the next one and I whipped it out in about an hour or two in front of the tv. Pretty quick consindering how many evenings I spent stitching and ripping up til now. So here is the end result of the other one.

Well, I hope the nephews like them because if they don't I might just steal them back and wear them myself. HA!HA!

Happy HOLY-days

Even though this is a special time of year that is loaded with meaning for me and my family, I felt a feeling today that did not fit with what I know. As I sat in traffic and the snow was heavily falling I started sensing that depressing feeling. You know the one that Charlie Brown feels each year before Linus reminds him of the true meaning of Christmas. Well, I got focused quickly but was reminded of Christmas Past when I was stuck in the funk for extended periods of time. Last winter was a bad one. This year I am just not willing to to have my joy ripped away from me.

On more than one occasion this year the reality of the baby with a tragic yet redemptive future has over taken my mind. I think of the babies being born at a regular and frequent rate in my church. The face of anyone of them may be representative of the infant born to save me. It blows my mind and I have to remind myself that it is possible to keep Christmas separate from Easter and I can revel in the glory of the event.

Well, today is Friday and in this house that means Family Fun Night. Due to the slim condition of our pocketbook this week and the Snow Event we are currently experiencing, I dropped by the store on my way home and prepared to have Family Fun Night "in" tonight. Chicken Noodle Soup is always a favorite and I am looking forward to some Christmas Cookie baking and snowman building. The night will be finished off with a movie- Tinkerbell since Nick is out of town- and popcorn. Now doesn't that sound nice? And the house is even SORT OF clean.

Ahhhh! LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW!

A "New" Yard?

I want to start by saying that I have given into the peer pressure of my neighbors and this year my yard boasts the greenest most weed free grass since we moved into this house 7 years ago. Sadly, this is a result of the chemicals I put on my lawn in the spring. Unfortunately, until I find another way that is cost effective I will probably continue to try to catch up to the Joneses (their name really is Jones and their yard is beautiful always) in my attempt to keep a green yard in the same chemical way. Like nature, relationships with neighbors can be a delicate balance. Don't get me wrong, I have really nice neighbors all around but I feel this pressure not to be the only eyesore on the block. So I find myself using insane amounts of water and minimal amounts of herbicides/fertilizers on my lawn to try to keep a somewhat acceptable looking yard.


Having said all that I must say that my truest desire is to have a "green," green yard- and life for that matter.

A few days ago my mom was telling me of the monstrous slugs that she was finding in her yard. The most obvious thing for her to do was to head over to the home and garden store and get some slug killer and administer it in her yard as directed. It worked like a charm. Huge dead slugs found instead of huge live slugs. Mission accomplished. That is until her neighbor told her that she had found a frog in her own yard and knowing that her dogs would kill it if they found it she put it into my mom's yard. Mom speculated that it is possible that the slug killer might not be good for the frog and that a garden frog is more desirable that getting rid of slugs so out with the slug killer and in with Mr. Frog. I don't think she ever saw the frog so we are not sure if it made a run for the river or what but mom's yard dilemmas don't end there. A couple days after the slug/frog discussion we were in her back yard together and I started noticing dead beetles all over her yard. The good kind that eat decomposing this and that. She pointed out that they were all over her yard. All dead. This brought my mind back to the slug killer. Could it have been what killed all these beetles? It certainly gave us something to think about regarding our yard keeping practices.

Next topic up for discussion was her lawn problems. For years she has been trying to get her lawn to grow. But the yarrow just keeps taking over and she can't justify all the water that it takes to fight the losing battle. As we walked over the yarrow with our bare feet I told her I liked it. "ARE YOU KIDDING??? I HATE it! I can't get rid of it." was her response. I told her it was nice to walk on and smells good. Keeping it mowed low seemed to keep it feathery soft and walking on it released the pleasing aroma. I have heard snippets of people allowing whatever is indigenous to their area grow in as a ground cover to replace water guzzling lawns as a practice of green living. The light bulb just came on and we both just realized at the same time that instead of fighting to keep the lawn green maybe she should surrender to nature and LET her lawn go "green."

Sooo, anyway, I guess that though I don't have the whole "green- living" thing down yet, I am very encouraged to see it start happening around me. I know that as our culture becomes more green minded it will be easier to integrate it into my lifestyle and for that I am thankful!

WHY DO I HOMESCHOOL?

Today marked the end of an era for my family. At exactly 10:15 today my youngest child left her first grade class for the last time and I cried. I went around and said my goodbyes to some of the office staff, and I cried. I looked for the first grade teacher before school and she was not there, yet. It was probably a good thing though because as I blubbered my thanks to the office staff I looked down to see my 7-year-old looking very confused and distressed. I figured loosing it in front of her or her class might not be the best idea. I cannot go without mentioning that this lady is the best first grade teacher I have ever met.

After picking her up from her last day of school I came home and cried some more. The reason that this is hitting me so hard is that these ladies (both the office staff and teacher) have been with me and seen me through some of my most difficult adult days and decisions. I will be forever changed because of some of the timely words spoken from these important people. And now I have said my last goodbyes. Sure I can go say “HI” occasionally but they will not play the same role that they have.

As I cried at home, all of a sudden a peace started settling over me as I started to turn my attention to activities that I have been putting off for lack of time. Then I remembered, it is this peace that is one of my big reasons for homeschooling. I have very carefully planned the next years schedule to allow for as little stress as possible. No early morning enrichment classes, leisurely breakfasts if that is what we want. In addition to the amazing curriculum that I have chosen to teach, I have complete control over the level of intensity and stress that we will experience.

When I was young, even a young adult, I had an idea of how things were supposed to be “when you grow up.” Now that I am half way through my third decade I am beginning to realize that much of what I thought was wrong. At least it was wrong for me. And maybe wrong for my children. You do not have to go to work for someone else for eight hours a day to make pennies just to come home and have a few hours off before doing it again. If you function in one way, you do not have to force yourself to function in another way. You may have to find creative ways to function your way in a world that functions in it’s own way but you do not have to force yourself to be something you are not.

I spent a long time hating my inabilities and not realizing that in trying to be one thing, I was actually stifling who I am. I am homeschooling so that I can help my kids be who they are. So that I can know they are getting the best education possible in the best learning environment for them. I am homeschooling so I can raise them to be the best adults they can be.

CAPTAIN PHIL HARRIS

It all started at about 4:00 pm yesterday afternoon when I walked into Albertson’s for dinner stuff. As I walked in I was immediately fixated on a poster with a big picture of one of the stars of Deadliest Catch, Captain Phil Harris. The poster announced that he would be here the next day for one hour signing autographs as a promotional event for Alaska Brewing Company. I just stood there for a couple of seconds smiling from ear to ear looking like an idiot, no doubt.

Fast forward 20 hours. I had told everyone I thought might care. I had made sure Hannah would be there so we could work it into a “homeschool” experience. I had my camera in hand. I was nervous because I would never know what to say to a famous person. “Hey… How’s it going….duh!” But, here I felt that being a fan of the show I could ask a question or two, get an autograph and move on. Was there some mild idol worship- I had to ask myself, I don’t think so…

So, we showed up, stood in line with Hannah’s preschool teacher, got our autograph asked him a couple questions and moved on letting the next person in line have their moment. The line was pretty short so after wandering around for 20 minutes we got back in line and waited for another chance to speak for a few minutes with him. As the line wrapped up and it was almost time for him to go a few more people got in line behind us as we finally got our chance to speak to him again, making me feel pressure to be quick. At the end of it all I walked away feeling like Captain Phil Harris was the kind of guy you could sit down to dinner with and have a long interesting conversation. What impressed me was that for every question I asked he engaged in the conversation. Like, if there weren’t people waiting you could have more than ,"I really like your show." And he didn’t just answer questions about himself, he asked questions back. For example, when we said Hannah was homeschooling and wanted to learn more about what he did he asked her how it was going for her. The kind of person who is not only interesting but will take an interest, as well. Then again, maybe he was just being polite and really just wanted to get out of there.

On last nights previews for next weeks show we learned that Captain Phil had a near fatal experience. I got online today and found out quickly that he indeed had some problems. When I asked him if he was getting better he said he would know in two months. His situation is precarious and though it was loud in the store and hard to hear I thought he said he had another blood clot that they were keeping an eye on. This is very scary as it can actually lead to death. He said that the DR. told him he could not survive the same thing again.

Each person is valued by God and is loved like a child is loved by a parent. Phil Harris is no exception. It is easy to take a famous person out of that place of being loved by God and scrutinize their life and actions but God’s view of the person remains the same. It has become a burden on my heart today to pray for this man and the people in his life. From the TV program we know Captain Phil to be a superstitious man. All the captains pray before heading out to sea and I would imagine that such a deadly occupation holds few non-believers. If you have read to the end of this longer than usual entry, please stop for a second and say a prayer for this man and his loved ones. Pray for his life, his health, his soul, his efforts to quit smoking. You may hold no kind feelings in your heart for Captain Phil Harris of the Cornelia Marie, but God loves him deeply and cares as much for him as he does for you or me.

And to Captain Phil, If you are ever in the area again, you are invited to dinner so we can have that conversation that I think would be so interesting.

ASSURANCE

The remarkable thing about assurance is this: When we rest on the Word first, we get the feeling afterward. This is well illustrated in the story of a man's carrying a bag of potatoes on his back. He was asked by a skeptic, "How do you know you are saved?" Taking a few more steps forward, then letting the potatoes fall, he replied, "How do I know I have dropped the bag? I haven't looked around." "No," replied the critic, "but I suppose you can tell by the lessening of the weight." "Exactly," said the Christian. "That's how I know I am saved. I have lost the guilty feeling of sin and sorrow and have found peace and satisfaction in my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ by simply resting on His Word."

FORGIVENESS- A GIFT TO YOURSELF

I went to visit some family last week and had a recurring discussion. For some reason the people I love seem to think that UNFORGIVENESS is a personal right that should be exercised regularly. They proudly announce as we watch some tragedy on the news, “Could you imagine? I could never forgive them if that happened to me!

There is the real tragedy- not forgiving. It seems to be so clear to me that when you forgive- or not- it does not truly affect the wrongdoer in any way. Being forgiven can even be had without the forgiven one even being aware of it.

The act of forgiveness is, in most cases, for the forgiver NOT the forgiven. So in effect, when you forgive someone, whether they deserve it or not, you are actually lifting the weight off of yourself. You are essentially removing the burden of the crime effect from yourself and allowing yourself the chance to move out from under the power that the wrongdoing has taken over you.

Christians observe the crucifixion of Christ to be the ultimate act of forgiveness for sin. All that one must to do to be forgiven is to accept the gift of forgiveness from God. In this case the act of forgiveness is for the wrongdoer. Also, in the case of legal or official acts of forgiveness, It releases someone from the punishment that they have coming.

Before his death, however, Jesus said that if you cannot forgive your fellow man, forgiveness from the Father will not be given to you. You will not be forgiven by GOD if you cannot find forgiveness in your heart for others.

My thought has always been, “If God can forgive me of MY sins, who am I to take the throne and withhold forgiveness from another person. I am not God, and my understanding of anything falls way short of his. But at times I have become so proud to think that I had some right to withhold what was so generously given to me. NO!!

I am sure we have all felt at some time the gnawing feeling of sickness during a time of unforgiveness. And in turn the relief and elation at having that burden lifted. But I tell you most of us have harbored some hidden unforgiveness in our heart and you will only do yourself the favor if you find that thing that is hidden- or not- and forgive once and for all.

THE VOICES IN MY HEAD

The world was a quieter place back then. Each mess was mine. I would run away to fill the empty spaces with unhealthy things avoiding my own clutter and silence. But then the voices came.

First the big one. That one really caught my attention. I couldn’t focus on anything else. That voice was all I wanted to hear. So I decided to give myself over to it. I was obsessed with it at first but eventually it started to say things I didn’t want to hear and was slightly less desirable. Now, that it was in my head, though, it would stay. The voice and I found peace with each other and continue to do so.

Soon there came a smaller voice. It was a beautiful, demanding voice that interrupted my sleep for no obvious reason. Because it did not allow me to sleep I would sit for hours in the night playing solitaire on the computer. That seemed to quiet the voice.

The two voices seemed hard to please all the time so I decided not to allow any more voices into my head. I realize now that it was just hard to please myself all the time while tending to the voices. Without my permission the third little voice snuck up on me. It was little like the other one but had different things to say. It actually demanded more time than the other two but it did it in a way that made me want to devote all of my time to it. It was a sweet voice that I would hear sometimes coming from the far reaches when I was doing something else.

Over time I decided to allow three more voices to come in. They needed me so I made room in my head for them. The funny thing is that the more voices there were the happier all of the voices seemed.

Eventually two of them didn’t need me any more and left. Luckily, Christmas and Summer time is always a chance to welcome them back for a short time. When they visit they are loud and exhausting! But it is worth it to allow them to occupy a cramped space once in a while. I miss them when they leave again.

Now there are just five of us. Me and the four voices in my head. And one of them, only on weekends and during the summers. I love my voices. They need a lot of care and love. But they are happy to return it.

The world was a quieter place back then… but lonelier. I would never give up the voices in my head. I see a lot of people who will not allow little voices to interrupt their busy lives but they do not know what they are missing out on. Am I crazy? Probably.

WORST MOM EVER

It was a great honor to hear my daughter say, “Mommy, you are the best mommy in the world.”

I ignored the voice that said, “HAH! No you are not and you know it!”

I ignored that voice because SHE thinks so! Of course she won’t forever but she does now and that is all that matters.

And in a few years I am certain that I will hear, “YOU ARE THE WORST MOM EVER!” And it will be then that I am reassured, once again, that I really AM the best mommy in the world.

GOOD FRIDAY

It was now about the sixth hour, and there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour, while the sun’s light failed, and the curtain of the temple was torn in two. Then Jesus, crying with a loud voice, said, “Father, into thy hands I commit my spirit!” And having said this he breathed his last.


Luke 23:44-46

The Revised Standard Version

Thank you Lord - you have saved your people, we are safe because of what you did!

BLEW THE HOUSE DOWN

She settled in to hear daddy tell a bed time story. It was the Three Little Pigs and The Big Bad Wolf. She was completely silent as he told the story she had heard so many times before in her three short years. She could almost recite it right along with him. But then-

BRAAWWWWPPP!

Then she couldn’t stop giggling. After several minutes she calmed down enough to say, “Daddy! You blew the house down with your butt!!!!”

Daddy was laughing so hard that by the time he could talk he forgot to remind her that she wasn’t supposed to use the word “butt.”

OH NO! I CAUGHT YOU AGAIN!

She has always been in some sort of trouble. Even now as my heart soars to see her at the end of the school day, her classroom behavior plagues me with daily notes from the teacher.

When did it start? I am not really sure. Maybe, on that fateful day when she was 18 months old and I saw a marked change in the, previously PERFECT, behavior of my small child. I asked her, “Is my little angel turning into my little monster?” With a happily mischievous look she took a deep breath and growled. “RAWRRRRR!!!”

I guess I should have known then that I was in for it. As the days passed, I found murals, carefully drawn in sharpie, on the walls of our rental. Dirt became her favorite snack. If that wasn’t available grass or leaves were a favored alternative. Any tool or item that could alter any other item was a newfound toy. A fork to etch made up words into the oak dresser her Great-grandfather had built for her. Crayons have marked on the doorjambs and walls labeling everything as hers. Stickers placed on every conceivable surface. Red-orange lip-gloss painted into the fabric of our old beige couch. All these actions are signs of careful execution and total lack of exercise of impulse control.

So, now at the ripe old age of eight, should I be surprised by what I see when I walk around the corner? My heart sinks as I say, “Oh no! I caught you again.”

MY DAY AS SUPERMAN

I was maybe 4. Superman was probably the most popular superhero and he could fly. Which was enough to make me love him. What kid doesn’t dream of flying? Well, little did I know but by the end of the day he would no longer be my favorite superhero.

My sister was just a baby and so my mother was preoccupied with her and she was more of a plaything than a playmate. Which was probably why I was kicked outside to play.

The tree in our front yard was easy to climb and at the age of 4 I was able to climb REALLY high- about 5 feet. I don’t know if I set out climbing the tree with a certain plan or if the idea came to me once I was up there but I did have a brilliant idea. My mind was full of 4-year-old imagination and it never occurred to me that my fantasies might not be possible in reality. After all to a child, fantasies are reality.

I got completely into character as I stretched out my arms in true superman fashion. I crouched and visualized my flight and the feeling of soaring. I leapt up and out as hard as I could and yelled, “SUPERMRPH!”

Ow, ow, ow, ow. Flying isn’t supposed to hurt! As I rolled over I realized that no spankin’ I ever had hurt so much. You know…I bet Spiderman never falls out of the sky…

And it has been Spiderman ever since.

Aunt Sandy’s Kitchen

As she smokes and talks I breathe deep and I let my mind drift back.

I am about 7 sitting in Aunt Sandy’s kitchen. The sunlight shines bright into window and filters through the ribbon of smoke drifting up from the ashtray on the table. It is early fall so the heat has mostly gone and we can cook again for fun. I stare at the cigarette smoke as it gracefully changes shape and curls. I let my breath out a little faster and watch it waft away as a new column instantly fills the empty space. I breathe it in having no idea what it is doing to my lungs. I just know I like it. It smells good.

Then the aroma is replaced by something different. My trance is broken by the popping sound coming from the frying pan. Mmmm. Fried food. We are making egg rolls and to me it seems adventurous. I have no idea where my sister is so I have Aunt Sandy all to myself. I stand up and walk over to the counter and look at the wraps thinking how odd it was that THAT is what you make egg rolls from.

A year or so later my aunt and uncle move away and divorce. He is never very happy after that. His eyes always so sad. And I never get to see Aunt Sandy again.

I realize where I am as I pull back and look at the smoke. As she realizes it has drifted into my face she waves her hand through it, “I am sorry. I didn’t realize it was coming your way.”

“It is ok,” I tell her. “It makes me remember.”

I get up and move anyway.

Looking Forward

This is the gray time of year around here. The time when we might get hit with a few more little snow storms but are just as likely to get hit with thunder and lightning. As I stare out at the gray it is hard to imagine that soon the color will be emerging from it's sleep. Even as I think about it I can start to feel the warmth on my arms and think of myself squinting against the, so far nonexistent, sun. I remember the burn that I will feel as I sit too long in the suns rays and that if we don't get the air conditioner soon it will be another summer of waiting out the heat in the basement. I am thankful for each season because each season has a purpose. I am also thankful that just as each season starts to seem a little too long it slowly comes to an end making room for the next display that our region has to offer. Soon there will be little colorless lumps on the bare branches. Just as they become noticeable they will pop with colors of green and pink and white. I am watching and waiting because it is coming soon, and I can hardly wait.

The Day I Realized There Was No Santa

We were in her car just the two of us. I had to ask. She would know. And she never lied. It was really a big deal with her. I wasn’t sure I wanted to ask or if I really even wanted to know. The day was coming soon though and everyone at school was talking about it. As I tried to come up with the right words to ask, I had an idea.
“Adam says that Santa isn’t real.”
“Oh. Really?”
She didn’t say anything else for a long time.
I knew something was weird. This is what she did when she didn’t want to tell me something but would if I pushed it enough. She was waiting for me.
“Auntie, is Santa real?”
“What do you think, hon? Do you think Santa is real?” she said.
“I think Santa’s not real,” I said.
She waited again.
“Ok. Well, then I guess you if you are old to figure it then I will tell you. Santa isn-“
It was too much! I just wasn’t ready! What did I even open my mouth?
“YES HE IS!”
Again, silence.
“OK, sweetie. You are right. Santa is real.”
It may not have been first time I realized there was no Santa but it definitely finalized it for me.
I should have kept my big mouth shut!

PONDERING CHILDREN AND COMPASSION

Sometimes, I look at the kids in my life and think they must be the coolest kids on the planet. The most darling precious little people. I find myself wondering how everyone doesn’t notice just how completely fantastic they are. Then, I think about the pictures of children hanging on someone else’s wall and realize, they feel exactly the same way about those children, even though they go completely, for the most part, unnoticed by me. And then the real epiphany begins as I realize that however much I love my own children and no matter how cool I think my friends’ kids or my nephews are, God looks at each one of us as if we are the most fantastic creation ever. He loves us all so much that we cannot even begin to get it. We get a little hint of it when we love up our own kids but, really, we have no idea.

I think that as an American I begin to feel a certain feeling of entitlement. “Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” are a given in this country. These are man made promises not God’s promises. He promises a great life after this one not IN this one. But that does not mean that he does not love us and WANT us to be happy. We want our children to be happy but we do not always give them what they think will make them happy.

It saddens me to watch my little one grow up in a world that does not really accept her for her fabulous differences. She does not fit into the “norm” so certain children, usually girls, look down their noses at her and whisper. She takes it like a trooper and really seems to be the happiest kid in the world but I wonder how much of it really gets to her. I have to let her go through it because it will make her a stronger, more compassionate adult. And, frankly, she will be a much more interesting adult than all the clones trying to be accepted by each other.

I think that when we go through tough times, as children as well as adults, God looks at us and because he loves us so much is saddened but he knows that when we get through it we will be stronger, more compassionate and frankly, more interesting than we would be otherwise.

Being Recession Proof

One of my favorite classes during my Junior year of Highschool- that would be more years back than I care to remember- was Economics. Not HOME Economics- just plain old economics. You know, where you learn to balance a checkbook and how to think about money. Well, there are a couple of things that I learned in that class that have really stuck with me over the years. One- using a credit card to purchase something you cannot afford is stupid. I knew that to keep a credit card on hand “just in case” would probably be too much of a temptation for me so that was not a good idea either. So, needless to say, credit card debt has never been a financial problem of mine. Not having enough money in general has always been my main complaint. The second thing I learned is that during the Great Depression there were a few industries that were unaffected by the nations economic state. Those have always been in the back of my mind any time I was thinking about “what I want to be when I grow up.” Incidentally, I still have not figured out that one.

The two “recession proof” industries that really stuck in my head were the medical and the entertainment industries. I ruled out both of those areas to find my career in. As I thought about the idea of recession proofing my life I began wondering if there are other industries that are safe in the face of the oncoming recession. After a 5 minute check of the internet I found a couple others- vices (cigarettes, booze, etc) and food. I wonder if I am the only one worried about this kind of thing right now… doubt it.